The SELFCANNIBALISM
by CERNO
Summary: SEIFER CANNOT STOP HIS OBSESSION FOR SQUALL, BUT AT THE SAME TIME, HE DOESN'T NEED HIM. HIS ONE SHOT. YAOI. SXS


The Self-Cannibalism. by CERNO

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN FFVIII**

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In the middle of the moonless night, the faint figure stood motionless. A murder had occured, and a human being had been killed. He was slaughtered into pieces that any man can not see with bare eyes but the murderer himself did not heed. Dark stain of cold blood on his face did not bother him and he did not move for more than the entire night. His eyes carried no pity or guilt or even excitement, but a lustful anger. When the sun was finally setting, he slowly decided to walk with the crimson weapon dragging behind to another place where his sword can feed itself. Once the killing started, it couldn't be stopped except by existence of one man. His pathetic mind longed for that man to notice. Until then, he would kill others, then himself, then... 

"Seifer!"

The killer smiled. When its figure ran towards him, he kissed the beloved one. His arms tighetened around him, forcefully stopping any attempts to escape. Strand of liquid blood ran through both of their mouth to the neck and the killer's weapon drew close to the necks. It made a thin cut of skin and the brunette shortly jerked back while the blonde emotionlessly licked the blood around his mouth. The grip on his waist was still tight and his tongue touched the surface of the beloved's cheek, leaving a warm blood mark. Gasping, the brunette's chin faltered and he was released. But the sharp blade still remained in the killer's hands, violently scraping the palms that held it. Same happened to his arms along the line of his shoulders and chest until the beloved finally led out a cry.

"Stop..! please stop.. Seifer, Seifer.. Seifer..!!"

Despite of the all the blood that ran carelessly, the killer made a cynical expression as if nothing had happened. Tears did not stop the pain or the blood. Just a faint smile, a sarcastic and dead smile of face muscles was made. The beloved's innocent fingers was soon changed to crimson red, but the killer pushed it away from his chest, turning back.

Was this called love? Can someone love with a stained, slaughtered heart? Is a heart that had been cut too many times incurable? Can it be saved with love? Blood and water, can it go together? If I cannot feel the same pain that you felt, how can I save you? Don't leave me, but don't stay with me. I will devour you someday because of my obsession of you. Like a childish kid, I will long for you and betray you. Don't love me, but love me. Am I more important or are you more to me? I kill myself for you, so can I kill you? Will I be remebered in your head forever if I kill myself for you? With an addicted self-cannibalism, can I have all of your attention?

"Squall..."

His face expression was hidden and his voice was still from the back, but he was crying soundlessly without any difference but the blended tears in blood. The tears was out of his permission, and he himself did not know the reason. On the other side, the beloved stood on his knees with his pale face and hurtful eyes.

"...Do you pity me"

He continued, asking as a statement. The beloved muttered in a faint voice. 'do you love me, Seifer.' When the answer wasn't given and Seifer tried to take his last step, Squall approached his back with something covering his throat from saying the righ words. Seifer turned around with dripping blood. He had the first and the unknown emotion in his eyes, and gently covered the beloved's face. Then he lightly kissed his forehead, giving the first and unknown smile that really belonged to him.

"...Good bye, I can't give what you want."

"Why, if you love me, be with me, Seifer. I... love you. I know you are in such a pain that can't be treated. I can give you the love you need. Stop murdering others and yourself. Let's live together. We'll be together. You don't have to kill. You don't have to lose yourself. Please accept me. I won't betray you.

Seifer sighed. Did the obsession have to be Squall? This was a lie. Everything was a lie. Did he want attention after all? Was attention he needed? Did he need love? What was it that he needed and wanted from the beloved? Open your eyes.

"Kill me Squall, pass this blade through my empty chest so I can die."

"Seifer!"

It's annoying. It's quizzical. I can't stand it. Kill, please, kill and kill, continue to kill for me. Kill, kill, kill, kill.

"Let's do a little test, Squall. If you win, I live, and if I win, I die."

Squall wondered, 'Was nothing possible from the beginning?' His sad eyes did not respond and desired for Seifer to return. Since when did he start killing? In the beginning, there was no love at all, maybe hatred that was mistaken. This was last chance.

"...In less than three minutes, one of us die. Who do you think it will be?"

Squall didn't hesitate as he gave his small smile.

"Me.. because.. I won't let you die. Seifer I won't. If you kill yourself, I'll follow so, it'll be both but it wouldn't matter by then would it?"

Seifer's cold tears ran along his cheek line. Squall's body layed cold on the floor with blood running out from his chest. The killer gave his final kiss. Because you win, I live.

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A/N: ONE SHOT YAOI, SEIFER X SQUALL PAIRING, GENRE ANGST. 


End file.
